Should headscarves be banned in schools? A few days ago, Berlin Labour Court confirmed: school administration may prohibit a teacher with a headscarf from teaching at a primary school. But legal situation is not same everywhere, cloth remains controversial. Deniz Baspinar, psychological psychorapist in Cologne, says: There are good arguments for a general ban on headscarf at schools.
Dilara * is pregnant with her second child. The petite young woman has a difficult period behind her. After first child, she was not able to re-enter profession, so she now wants to complete her family planning. The first child is already going to school, it's a girl. Now Dilara wants a boy. During pregnancy she has a dream: everything is brightly lit. She joins window, sun shines on her belly. She n closes wild animals in cages.
She interprets dream as a call from God to tame wild beast: her ego, her nefs. She has been thinking about headscarf for some time now. Dilara believes in Allah, she fasts, but her hair is still wearing it. Why is she not consistent and goes last step, she wonders. Her husband also encourages her to wear a headscarf. and is not sister-in-law who wears a headscarf clearly preferred by in-laws? That annoys Dilara. Perhaps re is something like an unspoken trade with God: I wear a headscarf – and in return you give me a healthy young and nicer in-laws.
Dilara chooses cloth. Her husband goes shopping with her, she needs new clos: headscarves, long sleeveded shells, tunics, coats. On an Islamic holiday, sugar Fest, she lays cloth for first time. She binds it, as she knows it from women of her environment.The cloth signals self-overcoming
The reactions are positive. All congratulate you on this step. You can now see light of God in your face, you say. There's a lot of talk about NEFs. The Turkish word goes back to Arab nafs, it means self, soul, but also something like instinct. Controlling his nefs means self-control or self-overcoming. It means that one turns away from worldly joys and vanities and that one overcomes his fall seeking.
Dilara accepts compliments thankfully. Her husband is now much more attentive to her. Yet she feels a strange feeling of discomfort with cloth. She hopes that will be with time.
But second child will be a girl again. Dilara is very disappointed, n becomes bitter from disappointment. Why do you never fulfill your wishes, she thinks, what else should she do? The headscarf becomes more uncomfortable. When she wears it, she breas worse and feels a heavy burden. She suddenly feels much older with cloth. In order not to have to wear it, she even avoids going out of house.
She asks her husband what he think of it when she put headscarf down again. There's a quarrel. The husband accuses her of having laid out headscarf on a whim. How does he stand when his wife puts towel back? He would be man of an unserious, capricious woman who cannot control her nefs. He's threatening to divorce.
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